The Purpose: To log the next year of my life-the ups, the downs, and the in-betweens-in a manner that will let my friends and family know that, yes, I am still alive, even 4000+ miles away.

The Plan: To post pictures, music, food, art, and other new discoveries, along with a written log of my everyday, ordinary or not, life as the year progresses.

Friday, December 10, 2010

I tried. I really did.

I couldn't leave. I can't leave these people.

I was supposed to be on a bus to Dublin this morning. It's 3:53 PM. I'm still in Cork.
I was in line for the bus and I couldn't make myself get on. My legs would not move.

Now I'm waiting for a train. I wonder how long it will take me to force myself on that?

Why is it so hard to say goodbye? Why am I so needy right now? Agh.
I am coming back, and I can't leave. So many are leaving for home this weekend. Some are already gone. It hurts.

Who knew three months would bring me so close to people and make it so hard to say goodbye?

I hate change.

Last night was so good. It could have lasted forever...
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2 comments:

  1. DanielDecember 11, 2010 at 10:38 AM

    Claudia...

    ReplyDelete
  2. DanielDecember 11, 2010 at 11:04 AM

    Leaving people you love is never easy. They become part of you, pieces of yourself. So when the time comes to say goodbye, it's like ripping off a bit of yourself. It'll leave a wound, it may even leave a scar if the connection was close enough. But time heals all. Some things more quickly than others, and although the scars may always be there to remind you, these were people you cherished. They were your friends and the scar that's left will become a friendly reminder, a memory to put a smile on your face.

    I know it may be extremely difficult, and I can't even begin to fathom just how painful and unfair it may seem to you that your friends are leaving. Change is taking them away, I cannot deny that. But change also made it possible for you to meet the wonderful people I'm sure you've made strong bonds with. Without change you would not have had the opportunity to meet them in the first place.

    "Life gives and life takes."
    "There is joy and there is sadness."

    You are living life. You are currently living sadness. But life's intricate cycles will soon take you out of sadness and give you something to be joyous and thrilled about. And like I've said before, time may find that you'll meet your friends again one day. You may think the chances are slim, but it was a slim chance that you'd come across them to begin with...so don't let the possibility escape your mind so easily.

    Miss you Ms. Carpenter, and please don't be sad anymore ok?

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